I’ve seen that behavior with men, and I’m sure it occurs also with women. It’s like dog pack behavior, only with humans. A guy who might be able to resist temptation if he were alone, is almost sure to give in to temptation when surrounded by his cheating friends.
If you’re young and have no interest in being in a monogamous relationship, then this may be of no importance to you now. However, if you’re married or in a committed relationship, you should think about the people you hang out with. Not only are you (sometimes unfairly) judged by the company you keep, but you’re probably at least somewhat also influenced by them.
If you’re concerned about your relationship, you might want to rethink the people with whom you’re associating if they are the type who are consistently unfaithful to their mates. It’s not that you’re unable to stick to your morals when you’re with them. It’s just that when surrounded by people who are participating in that type of behavior, it doesn’t seem as ‘wrong’ as it would if you were alone or with other friends. That type of behavior, when you’re around it enough, seems to be normal, and therefore, not something you would feel so bad about doing.
That’s why it’s not a good idea for married people go out with friends who are single. The single people are trying to hook up, and the married people either do it, too, or are tempted to do it. It takes a strong person to be in a club or bar atmosphere, where there is lots of testosterone flowing, and not participate in behavior that his partner would consider cheating. It’s like playing Russian Roulette. If you play it long enough, you’re bound to lose. Why subject yourself to that kind of temptation when you know the possible consequences?
Okay, I know you miss hanging with your friends, but rather than going to a club, meet them for lunch or maybe a game of golf. If you want to avoid infidelity, you have to be smart about the places you go, the people with whom you surround yourself, and the things you do when you’re away from your partner.
It’s not an accident that some people are faithful–it’s a choice they’ve made. They chose to put their partners first, rather than their friends. Friends are important, but when they are more important than your partner, you’re asking for trouble.
If you’re in a marriage or committed relationship that is important to you, think about the influence your friends, acquaintances, and coworkers have on you and the way you behave. If you’re more likely to be unfaithful when you’re with them, maybe you should be looking for some new friends.