Infidelity is such a painful experience, which not only causes you to question the validity of your relationship, but it also makes you question your own judgment. You wonder how you could’ve trusted, not to mention loved, someone who could make the conscious decision to hurt you so deeply. If you made the mistake of believing he was trustworthy, you wonder why you should trust yourself to make those decisions again.

You question what you did or didn’t do, what you are or are not, that might’ve caused your partner to cheat. You wonder what you could’ve done to prevent it, but the simple truth is that you probably couldn’t have prevented it, no matter what you did or didn’t do. There are exceptions, of course, but most of the time, it’s a simple matter of chemistry and opportunity.

There are so many factors that affect a person’s strengths, weaknesses, successes, failures and choices–everything from our relationships with our parents to our DNA. All those things also affect our relationships as adults. I’m hoping to share the different points of view, giving you understanding, which is important for our own well-being, as well as for your relationships, current and future. 

The key to healing is forgiveness. And the key to forgiveness is acceptance and understanding, and hopefully, in learning about the different areas of the triangle, we can reach that goal.